Back in December, 12/31 to be exact, I blogged about getting my first round of the COVID vaccine.  My family and I had for the most part taken the necessary precautions during 2020 to get to that point luckily with no illness (we were lucky).  By spring 2021, 3 out of our 4 were fully vaccinated and just before summer our youngest was the last to be vaccinated once his age bracket was given the go ahead.  To be honest, and as someone responsible for others, I was relieved we were able to reach that stage during such wavering times.  Now, nearly a year and half after all this began (at least for us locally), and having all my family fortunate enough to access vaccinations, I woke up Friday before last minus my sense of smell and taste.  I had been battling what I thought was a seasonal sinus infection earlier in the week but when that Friday came I was pretty much like “damn, after all this I got COVID.”

Sure enough later that day the doctor confirmed what my “lack of senses” had suggested.  I went to an ER clinic so I did not know the doc but we actually had a great 5-minute exchange.  I tried to complain when he broke the news and he was quick to assess the situation – “You’re fortunate to be simply inconvenienced; I’ve had too many patients that were incapacitated.”  And that my friends and family effectively canceled all my pity parties…

So on the title of ‘Learning at Home.’  In any other non-pandemic related year the discussion would be considerably different I suspect.  And what have we learned?  Schedules are important even when they are loosely followed.  Not knowing when to wake up translates to not waking up when most of North America does.  The first day of school was a site worth watching.    

My kids were not ready for Day 1 – and they were actually a bit uneasy by my assessment (but I’m just DAD who may or may not have taken a class or more in psychology).  The evening before school started back my wife and I watched ‘Friday Night Lights’ which I will confess is a DVD we own.  For those seeking similar inspiration, check out this clip.  It was all about the mojo we all needed before going live.

We have made it through the first two days with some bumps but not too much bruising. I suspect that first encounter for students and staff was all kinds of awkward and then schoolhouse normalcy set in. My wife and I both noticed separately how much more verbal (chatty) our boys were now that school is back in session. My many thanks to their teachers!

I will end this entry with observations I made about our new puppy while being on COVID house arrest. I’m sure I let her down because I was home and I think she thought jackpot – time to play! She behaved herself for the most part up until around 4 pm each day. The problem was that proved to be my busiest time supporting districtwide transportation. Learning at home is hard – the levity my Hope (my dog) gave me during our time together was sorely needed. She was an impatient student everyday waiting for instruction – what more could you ask for?!

I have to admit I once had a hush crush on Dan Pink – at the time his message just resonated with me.  For those less familiar with the author, he made his way into my orbit with his book A Whole New Mind.  He had a follow-up book called Drive some years later, which was also more than worth the read.  I lost interest after that for no real reason and have not really kept up with his work in over a decade.  Then, I recently came across a podcast in which he introduces the listening audience to Suneel Gupta.  You may have heard of Groupon but this CEO is way more than a retail coupon guy – see for yourself (click here). 

In August 2010 I was a featured speaker during our back to school kickoff pep rally.  I’d spoken at these types of events before but at the time we had a new superintendent and were using a new venue.  I can remember doing a walk through the evening before with our communications boss and our thought bubbles were surely in-synch.  My bit part in this convocation was to provide the state of the district address – performance-wise how were our students doing?  I had some slides to guide my speech but after 1 minute on the stage with 2,700 staff in seats waiting and needed technology not working, I winged it from memory.  One key part I pitched to the crowd was “what was their sentence” which was an idea I borrowed from Dan Pink’s first book and a project he ultimately launched (watch this short video for more information).  Back then I told the audience my sentence was “he provides the right folks with the right information.”  As I look back now I realize I was the lowest person on that totem pole should things have gone sideways.  They didn’t, thankfully, and I delivered my address on memory.  As a very small side note, I’ll indulge and share that a senior cabinet member at the time pulled me aside to share off the books appreciation.  I saved my hand written speech from back then as reminder…  

But what if I hadn’t kept it together? What if, on that day, I clammed up and folded? Backable was a good find for me and timely – it reaffirmed things I believe to be true and the power of proper preparation. As the adage goes, chance indeed favors the prepared mind. And as Suneel Gupta shares, your ability to get others to take a chance on you is largely dependent on your ability to inspire. As I watched the podcast, it made me instantly think of the parallels to what teachers do non-stop. They likely rehearse 21 times on average like the Groupon founder suggests before delivering a lesson. And they always check for understanding in ways that reinforce the learning. They have and always will be, BACKABLE.

I have to admit I was a bit dumbfounded on my latest read in Travel + Leisure – the most popular ice cream flavor in Texas was Rainbow Sherbet.  I’m not buying it – sherbet is poser wannabe ice cream at best.  Nothing rings more Texan than Homemade Vanilla by Blue Bell.  Period – end of a nonexistent story!  BTW yesterday was National Ice Cream Day and I hope you were fortunate enough to indulge in pure perfection straight from Brenham, TX.

The sherbet debate has never really come up in my household –we like push-ups and pops and everything else frozen and sweet for sure. But when it is time for grown up conversations on ice cream, I am admittedly the only responsible one in the room. Any debate on ice cream that doesn’t recognize Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla as the standard by which all others should be judged is just misinformed (IMHO). Other congregants in my household tend to run wayward and sample just about anything and everything. Blue Bell connoisseurs have restraint; we know what the best tastes like.

And I know it’s a bit of a stretch but I’m actually going to weave in some ethics in this debate as well – who knew sweetened and flavored frozen milk fat could segue so well into our moral fiber (I’m actually taking a graduate course right now and tonight’s zoom call class was on ethics and leadership).  And somewhat comical I suppose, I was chatting with my wife a morning or two ago about how I had let my Texas Monthly subscription lapse; it’s a personal favorite but regardless I somehow have never let my Psychology Today subscription lapse which I’m less invested in hands down.  In one of its latest features, one author journals about The Science of Predicting Unethical and Toxic Work Behaviors.  I’m sharing the article here because it’s one all school leaders should make note of and read. As alluded to I’m back in school myself and while I’m ready to show off all my budget and operations knowledge, I recognize the constant challenges inherent on matters I still need to further understand.  I’m challenged by what we do, what we can do, and what we ultimately end up doing.  The underlying tenet for the article cited and any worth mentioning is the matter of ethics.  Are you an ethical leader?  And why is this a question still worth asking?

So if you happen to prefer chocolate ice cream or any other inferior flavor, I promise not to exclusively judge you on this poor choice alone.  There really is no debate as far as I’m concerned, and therein lies the problem.  I’m actually a fan of bubble gum ice cream and still tell my wife to get me the clown cone at Baskin Robbins (she won’t btw). 

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As two scientists hashed out the so-called Great Debate now over a century ago around the universe and our origins, I’m reminded their discourse did not produce an overall “winner,” but rather a deeper understanding of nature and the universe, and maybe more importantly our place within in it.  As topics become even more sensitive in this day and age, I hope teachers like my 1^st grade teacher wife will maybe consider buying me that clown cone but if not at least continuing to entertain the discussion.

I’ve been traveling quite a bit here lately and each trip seems to have been eventful.  More recently, my oldest and I drove to Alabama via Houston, and learned some lessons along the way.  For starters, do not purchase baseball tickets through unregulated third party sites because you may get burned not once, not twice, but thrice!  I am not sure what knucklehead would allow that to occur but I have been told it happens…

Prior to us setting out, I had to put new tires on my son’s car and then upon arrival his side mirror fell off and the battery died.  An auspicious start to the first time we leave our first born to his own devices for an extended period.

So on the eve of our first night together before I flew back, I stumbled upon a movie about a decade old called Salmon Fishing In The Yemen.  For those not familiar, no spoiler alerts here other than a west Asian Sheikh wanted to make fishing available in thought to be impossible desert country.  Here’s a great line from the movie:

Faith is the cure that heals all troubles. Without faith there is no hope and no love. Faith comes before hope, and before love. (Sheikh Muhammad ibn Zaidi bani Tihama)

And an even more poignant speech later in the movie:

How many hours do you fish before you catch something?  Is that a good use of your time for a facts and figures man?  But you persist, in the wind and the rain and the cold.  With such poor odds of success, why?  Because you are a man of faith and, in the end, you are rewarded for your faith and constancy with a fish.

And then I read this article which chronicles the first legit crispy taco and how a young opportunist changes course and built Taco Bell.  Read the article – not for Glen Bell – read it for Salvador and Lucia Rodriguez.  I am presenting at a conference in San Diego in September and have already started planning for an early arrival so I can get to San Bernardino.  I am going to Milta Café.

Goodbye 2020-21 school year.  On behalf of me and my colleagues, we need to put this year permanently behind us.  For me, I’m on my way to the gulf coast and I just might fish some before swinging wide left for some tacos.  For those who give directions based on landmarks like some members of my family, I plan to cast a line just past Piggly Wiggly and then grab a taco next to In-N-Out Burger.  Feel free to join me!

My wife and I had dinner with some dear friends of ours this weekend and it reminded me how much we’ve socially distanced in the past year. It was a great evening for retelling the countless times of memories of mishaps we’ve had as friends. It was a time for us to candidly say right now doesn’t feel like the best of times and maybe we’re more appreciative and optimistic on what lies ahead.

We’re entering our final week of this school year and it will be eventful I’m sure.  This past week has shown the exhaustion mixed with exacerbation.  Kids are tired, parents are tired, teachers are tired, all of us are tired.  I had a recent conversation with another individual about all of this and he argued life is about overcoming hardships.

What a year?!  10 months with masks 7+ hours a day.  Or no masks and Zooming remotely.  I wonder if our elders think we’re tough enough based on our response and what they’ve previously faced.  Captured below is a note from one of my children’s teachers which reminds me educators have not wavered from their calling.  

“In the next twenty-four hours you are all going to have an opportunity to demonstrate your knowledge of history.  When I was a young teacher, the night before the exam, I worried that I had not prepared my students and that there is some aspect of the course I left out.  But now that I am in my prime, I don’t worry about that anymore; instead I worry that I haven’t taught you to be a critical thinker and analytical writer. I worry that I haven’t encouraged you to develop empathy, compassion and understanding.  I worry that you will go to college for career training rather than to hone your analytical skills. This class was never about me teaching you the course content; you could have all taught yourself everything you need to know. My goal was really quite simply to provide a venue for you to improve your critical thinking skills and for me have a place where I got to talk about history with curious students.”

He ends the note with one final thought – “I believe you and your knowledge and skills will win the day.”

This morning I read this article about chance encounters – an Uber rider forms a special bond with his driver and pushes her to go back to school and get her degree.  She does, with his help, and it’s another reminder of what a difference any of us can make when we take time to listen to one another.  Teachers have definitely tapped the brakes and intentionally slowed down this year to make sure their kids were accounted for.  Sometimes you just have to slow down before you can speed up.  I’m thankful for all the school folks who made sure my own kids’ needs were met this year while doing the same for all their other students.  In that respect, it was business as usual I suppose.  As they say where I come from, laissez les bon temps rouler!

I’m going to share a clip with you and if it doesn’t give you goosebumps I’ll be surprised – here we go:

Mark Rober and Son

At around the 3 minute 30 seconds mark this YouTuber describes in vivid detail how a person with autism likely experiences the world.  For those not familiar with Mark Rober, he was a NASA bonafide and Apple engineer; I should have just copied his Wikipedia profile!  The dude’s brain power is legit but the way he captures an audience is uncommon.  More remarkable though, is his next gen Bill Nye-style connection on promoting science and I’ve blogged about him before.  With over 18M subscribers, chances are you may have heard of him too.  And this evening he will be doing a livestream with Jimmy Kimmel and an A-list of celebrities to capstone Autism Awareness Month.

If you need a brain break (we’re in AP and SAT mode right now, with additional state testing on the way heading into these final weeks) I’m invoking all the tricks so check out this previous gem by Mark.  He’s a physics guy and everything he shares has been formed by his study.  But let’s be honest, how many people assemble an obstacle course for squirrels?!  He’s just wicked smart and hilarious in his sharing of knowledge.

And now he is disclosing his son has autism and admits how fiercely protective he is of him.  And later in the announcement there is a reference to a young man named J-Mac featured in the clip playing basketball (it’s worth the wait I promise).  I perked up quickly because I know J-Mac – and much of what I know I’m not going to blog other than he was a remarkable student in the school system I once served and he brought a community together.  He was like no other – he also was a Y guy and we ran into each other often at the gym while he was there with other students from the local high school.

I have never subscribed to the one up game (and I will continue to challenge that dogma) but I think this past year hopefully has taught us we don’t have time for the debate and we best get on board with the we up game.  We need less self-promoters and way more selfless servers.  I attended a meeting earlier this week that gathered basically our district’s brain trust and it was clear we still had some fuel left in the tank.  One principal shared out on a particular initiative and I sent her a follow up note – her leadership is the type we need to clone.  She’s always struck me as genuine and sincere and honest.  She’s not telling me what she thinks I want to hear.

As you head into the weekend on this final day in April, I hope all school folks can get some rest and begin to reflect on this lifetime year.  There is still much work left to be done but overall it’s definitely been a winning season.  And if you are up for some inspiration, check out that livestream I mentioned.

Friday, April 30th | 8PM EST / 5PM PST

I’ve spent the better part of this weekend thus far coming to terms with the title of this entry.  To clarify, I’ve been thinking about the implications of disconnecting and not what I would name this entry.

I’m learning as I go like most of you and as I do I’m leaning towards some new understandings.  Disconnecting in my household usually meant a heated exchange and implied the children consequently had restricted access to technology.  We as parents were disconnecting their access…

At the dinner table on Friday night our conversation made me revisit some of our set rules.  This has been an extremely disruptive year and I sense the adhesive on the duct tape is running weak as it tends to do in summer heat.  One of the concerns raised at my dinner table was how to maintain relationships when the opportunity to form them is COVID curtailed.  And at that moment I finally dialed into how hard it really must be for our kids right now.  In all honesty, it has to be overwhelming.

I went to the grocery store yesterday and I passed one school administrator from one campus and a counselor from another; I had to make a scene with both to establish recognitions (we’re all still wearing SAFETY masks). And then it donned on me how much I have failed to understand the impact of this pandemic. My boys have been in-person learners from the start of the year so they’ve had to wear masks for extended periods. I drop my younger son off at school around 5:50 am for swim practice and my older son generally has tennis practice after school until 4 pm. And yet they have to feel isolated in this whole pandemic response.

I read this article in USA Today which had a not so upbeat tagline and addressed the impact these past forever months have had on our kids.  Unfortunately, it’s a paywall site so if you do not subscribe you more likely will not be able to access.  The summary of the article acknowledged stress and depression are on the rise for America’s youth (the world’s youth for that matter) and feelings of isolation loom large.  In it several individuals were interviewed including children and adults.  One finding by a third party group (YouthTruth; it’s an open source and the survey can be accessed here) was that for high schoolers the biggest stressor has been the sense of disconnect from friends and loved ones compounded by the difficulties of focusing on school or work (we don’t talk nearly as much in the school biz about the impact this pandemic has had on our school-aged work force).  The survey data reflects responses from 20,000 students in grades 5-12 sampled across 9 states in the U.S. and to be honest if you study data like I do it hurts the heart.  The silver lining was the prevailing theme that relationships with teachers provided significant comfort amid all the chaos.  If you access the available slide deck on the website one note of mention is slide 34 – “Student-teacher relationships were reshaped in positive ways as teachers took a more personalized approach.”  As a parent of two, I have definitely observed this shift and it’s not to slight teachers but rather spotlight how collectively they’ve upped their A game.  What I may have overlooked or failed to appreciate was “while relationships with teachers improved for some while learning at home, students across the board reported a diminished sense of belonging in their school community” and “the ability to connect with friends received the lowest average rating of all items in the survey.”  We still have a lot of work left to do in reconnecting our youth – this is a challenge all adults must accept.  

Last week seemed to come full circle for me and helped clear some of the fog in my head.  We had our monthly school board meeting on Tuesday night which ran later than usual.  There was some follow up action for me from that meeting and in the course of it I also had the opportunity to exchange ideas with some area leaders.  And then I came across this article about a young man beginning to navigate his way into the workforce.  Check out the letter he penned to future employers:

Now no sooner did I read this was I presented with a flashback from 2 decades ago during a conversation with those same others.  I was asked to describe a moment in time I made a connection – that wasn’t the exact question but hopefully you get the idea.  And subsequently I remembered one student in particular.  I was fresh from Smart U and ready to solve everything; one of my first students was on the spectrum and struggling with 6^th grade.  I got to spend 2 years with him before I moved on to central office but I still went back and checked on him during his 8^th grade year.  He went on to a different school system for high school and we lost touch. 

Ten years later I got an email from that same student – I couldn’t do much of anything for the rest of that day.  He wanted me to know he finished high school and graduated from college, and was working in an outreach center to help others like him who struggled in social situations.  He told me I was the only one who made him feel normal and as humbled as I was, I quietly wept knowing I had no idea what he went through.

Chris Stapleton is another country music artist I follow and by my estimates released a perfect response track to COVID.  There’s more to the story than I’ve studied up on but in late August of last year he apparently checked out on social media and created a stir.  He’s a bit of a rebel rouser and the next day he released “Starting Over” – click here for the full track which also features his wife who is another singer-songwriter.  The whole song resonated with me but I was inspired by this part in particular:

Nobody wins afraid of losing

And the hard roads are the ones worth choosing

Grace and Grief was the topic my pastor addressed last week – it’s been a long COVID year.  His message was one of hope and one I tend to agree with.  I am hopeful, even if I’m starting over like so many of you.  My litmus test has always been would I tell my kids what I’m doing; if not, then I’m surely misbehaving!  My mom always had a way of extending her pervasive influence without effort because she just had that type of heart; my dad’s a good one too but our compassion has been learned by a great teacher.  I had a long talk with my own teacher wife a few days ago and I was reminded of how strong she is; 1^st grade teachers are immune to tears so take your best shot – they deal with it all day long.  They see folks young and old alike at their most vulnerable and they make them winners.

I heard on the news this morning that Dick Hoyt had passed away in his home yesterday at the age of 80.  His name most likely isn’t familiar to many but you simply need to think of the ironman father running marathons pushing his quadriplegic son (Rick).  His most famous last run before retiring, the 2014 Boston Marathon, was one I accidentally became forever connected with and have not since forgotten.

An excerpt below is included from the TeamHoyt website which cuts and pastes the background story:

Rick was born in 1962 to Dick and Judy Hoyt. As a result of oxygen deprivation to Rick’s brain at the time of his birth, Rick was diagnosed as a spastic quadriplegic with cerebral palsy. Dick and Judy were advised to institutionalize Rick because there was no chance of him recovering, and little hope for Rick to live a “normal” life. This was just the beginning of Dick and Judy’s quest for Rick’s inclusion in community, sports, education and one day, the workplace.

In 1975, at the age of 13, Rick was finally admitted into public school. After high school, Rick attended Boston University, and he graduated with a degree in Special Education in 1993. Dick retired in 1995 as a Lt. Colonel from the Air National Guard, after serving his country for 37 years.

There is obviously a lot more to the story but everyone now has some general context.

In April 2014, I traveled to Boston to present on a monitoring/intervention system my team and I had developed that relied on a lot of data but parceled it down to basic categories of need for students – a response system to differentiate a triage of interventions.  It was a good model which is why I got the opportunity to present in Cambridge at their most storied university.  I arrived on April 22^nd to a downtown Boston hotel which overlooked endless storefronts with “Boston Strong” posters; I arrived a day after the Boston Marathon one year removed from the terrible bombings.  I literally could have gone a day earlier if I had paid half attention and seen the race from my hotel room.  As mentioned, it was Dick (and Rick’s) last Boston Marathon.  In more “you can’t make this stuff up reveals,” Meb Keflezighi won the men’s race in 2:08:37 and became the first American male runner to win the Boston Marathon since 1983.

I’m not a runner by any definition.  A couple of weeks ago my oldest and I risked missing a flight due to traffic and we ran like our lives depended on it.  By the end, and by the way my heart was thumping and my breathing about sucked back my face mask altogether, I quickly determined I’m no Dick Hoyt.  And if I had any doubt, the next morning my legs reminded me and not so gently to not do that again until I get back in shape.

My boys came home with their Fjalraven backpacks, which doesn’t mean a whole lot to most probably but in our household it connects to the Swedish SAAB dad-mobile my oldest sports (turbo wagons are the stuff of legends by the way).  And my wife fell asleep early again in a long-sleeve T from the famous Canadian-revered outdoorsy clothing line.  Roots and backpacks might be just what we need to bounce back from this pandemic. Remembering what got you started in your crusade and having a knapsack full of needed items might prove essential.  As I have given this past year more thought, I’m inclined to get back to my own roots. Dick Hoyt reminded me again it’s more than okay to dedicate a lifetime to helping others, or at least trying to do so.

Welcome back from Snowpalooza!  What a disrupter this recent winter storm was for the U.S. but in particular a showstopper for Texas.  Since we have some travels under our belts as a family I have friends in lots of low places – lots of snow places as well.  They all checked in on me during the power outages and for the most part it was 75% concern 25% teasing.  ERCOT now has notoriety and the Lone Star State as a go it alone on an energy grid provider is convenient banter.  My house was one that lost power for extended periods and it got uncomfortably cold – I did get a little nervous about the coming days’ weather forecast and decided I should go ahead and get more firewood since we at least have a gas fireplace.  Four hours later into that endeavor I had enough firewood to push through the next few days.  If nothing else, our new puppy stayed mostly warm – she got a log every two hours…

The whole event was yet another impromptu transparency experiment.  What I mean by this is it instantly showed people responding without much preparation.  In my case, Randy at Randy’s Firewood LLC was the type of guy I hope my boys model.  I’m outdoorsy but not necessarily an outdoorsman; I’m not one to hunt and fish for my meals.  I have never bought firewood from Randy before but after spending 4 hours start to finish completing my transaction with him I’ll be back.  It was the worst wait ever but by the time I got to the counter I told him I had a midsize SUV and to fill it up.  Randy then responded with a gentle “no” but you can have “x” much.  To quote him mostly accurately “I didn’t want to open today but obviously I had to and I want to make sure I can help as many customers as possible so I am limiting the sales to all.”  Randy earned my lifelong patronage that day and my respect – it was really, really cold by any geographic standard (like 6 absolute degrees; not factoring windchill) and he was outside with his family from start to finish providing a means towards warmth for countless families.

Last night the boys were streaming a new show until the internet went bad so me and the missus ended up watching a recorded Bull episode.  After that we watched a dated Celebrity Undercover Boss and the episode featured Deion Sanders and covered many local DFW matters.  For most of it I teared up along with Deion, especially when he addressed the unsuspecting aspects and what he would do over.  The first feature person we meet is a gentleman who serves as a coach/man/father/caregiver to about 80 youth in a football league.  He shares with Deion his own childhood days, that he went on to play top tier D1 football on scholarship, then was struck by a motorist and wheelchair bound for 2 years.  He runs a lawn care business and has days where his utilities are in jeopardy because he invests most of his earnings in the youth program.

An opportunity away from soaring.

This quote we hear often from Deion throughout the show.

Next up we meet a phenomenal female high school football coach working in North Dallas.  “I take it personally when we fall short on the kids because you never know what it means for them.”  If you watch the episode, you’ll quickly realize she can coach anyone on anything; she’s just that good.

And then we’re introduced to a faith based homeless outreach program – we meet a young man going to college (with lawyer ambitions) but sleeps under a bridge and was in 15 foster families as a high schooler.  His only pair of shoes are flip flops with holes in them and he talks about gathering his sleeping bag every morning before heading to class.  I had a hard time composing that last sentence without busting into somewhat-quiet heaves and I was just recounting what the young man said. I felt guilty because I was watching it in my favorite chair on my big tv in my more than big enough house. My parents modeled community investment (that give back to your neighbors spirit) and on most days I fall short of what they did and they did so on much more humble providings.

An opportunity away from soaring.

I’m hopeful our staff feel they are on the verge of great breakthroughs with our kids.  Deion may be Prime Time, but for Perspective, just ask a teacher.